The ‘lose-lose’ situations. The ‘what-if’ mind games. The wavering. The anxiety. The regret of one choice made too quickly and another not quickly enough.
Indecision is crippling. Yet, it’s a common struggle for many of us in our day-to-day lives; from the menial matters of where to make a purchase, to the life-changing commitments of a relationship.
Independent of the specific indecision you may be wrestling with today: these 3 tools will, quite decisively, help you become a better decision maker today!
Knowing what particular decision is plaguing you at the present moment is not necessary to provide clear guidance on overcoming the indecision surrounding it! In fact, removing the “details” of your particular situation is quite helpful in ensuring we do not get lost them!
THAT is a major characteristic which indecisive individuals fall victim to. They believe that every single decision they make is unique… That the ‘wrong’ decision will have a tremendous negative impact downstream, and yet, the right decision is not clear!
Let’s clear things up right now, with 3 tricks to making better & more confident, decisions:
(1) Be Truthful: Know Yourself!
(2) Be Confident: No Fear!
(3) Be Accepting: No Regrets!
Tool 1 – Be Truthful: Know Yourself!
Indecision starts and ends with….you!
If one evaluates times of indecision, while the specifics may be unique, the overarching characteristics are the same…. You’re perception of the ‘ever so vast’ differences is the only thing that changes. YOU are the X factor!
Before you can be CERTAIN to make the right choice in any life decision, make sure you have a clear grasp on WHO YOU ARE!
Without knowing who you are, how can you ever hope to know what you need? Without knowing what you need, how can you ever hope to make decisions which are “right” for you?
An Internal Conflict….WINNING THE BATTLE WITHIN:
The fact is, many folks are indecisive because they are trying to keep two (or more) different, and often competing, aspects of themselves “alive”.
It is unlikely that you will make the right decisions that lead you to becoming a “family man” while simultaneously maintaining a “party boy” persona. This does not mean that party boys can’t, at times, operate on behalf of family – or that a family guy cannot cut loose from time to time.
No one decision defines us; it is the series of choices in a lifetime which reflect the person we chose to be.
It DOES mean, however, that one needs to have a clear vision on who they are in order to make the decisions which best align with that version of themselves for long-term happiness. No one decision defines us, it is the series of decisions throughout a lifetime that reflect the person we chose to be.
Confident decision makers have a keen understanding of who they are, and thus, who they are going to be. Confident decision makers know themselves, and thus, have an easier time trusting themselves and their intuitive decision making.
Confident decision makers know that, while mistakes are inevitable, the choices they make throughout their lives as a whole will help get them where they’ve always been destined to go.
Tool 2 – Be Confident: No Fear!
“What if I do X and Y happens!?” What if I do Y and X happens?!” “What if I don’t do either and both happen?!” WHAT IF WE STOP ASKING WHAT IF?!
Another common trait of the indecisive…the “what if” scenarios! Many indecisive people play an infinite game of “what if” with the universe. In essence, they perfectly lay out why every possible choice they make is doomed for failure.
Make the Decision to be Decisive!
As mentioned in the one-liner inspire today, “most good decisions start with the choice to BE DECISIVE!”
Again, ignore the details of your particular choice at hand. First, and foremost, CHOOSE to be DECISIVE!
The only bad decision is indecision. There are no lose-lose situations. If all choices appear to be bad, then recognize that the situation itself was the conundrum, NOT YOUR CHOICES!
You already know who you are, so trust that, over time, you will make a series of choices which best support that person you are becoming.
Stop competing with yourself. If you are at ends, it will be hard to make the ends meet. Know thyself, and thyself will be true to you in the decisions they make and the actions they do.
Put your faith in one clear version of yourself – and what follows is: confident, fearless, and decisive decision making!
We cannot get it ‘right’ all the time; UNLESS, you recognize that not getting it right today helps us get more right tomorrow!
Missteps are an important part of life, and cascades well into the third tool….NO REGRETS BABY!!
Tool 3 – Be Accepting: No Regrets!
nothin’ Wrong with Being Wrong!
Learn from it the missteps. It’s as beautifully simple and simply beautiful as that!
KNOW Yourself, NO Fear, NO Regrets
Indecisive folks use what they view as the ‘wrong’ decision in retrospect to support their desire to be indecisive in the future! They play ‘what if’ games once again, thinking about ‘what could have been’ if they made different choices. ALL OF THE SUDDEN, however, they start hypothesizing extremely positive outcomes from the choices they can no longer make!
Spending all that time and energy entertaining retrospect must be as exhausting as it is fruitless.
The best we can do is LEARN and GROW from the choices we make. Be at peace with this fact – and you can comfortably start to see EVERY decision as a WIN-WIN. Best case scenario, you made the ‘right decision’, worst case scenario, you learned from a situation of the past and, by doing so, have become a better decision maker for the future.
I am confident you will improve your decision making ability if you confidently DECIDE to follow these three simple steps!
YOU MAKE DECISIONS, THEY DO NOT MAKE YOU!
Take your power back, friend.
Thanks for liking my post on Satya- Namaste!
Absolutely, thanks for your thanks! 😉
Great post…really good points, particularly liked this part:
“Confident decision makers know that, while mistakes are inevitable, the choices they make throughout their lives as a whole will help get them where they’ve always been destined to go”
Couldn’t agree with that statement more. I know in my life that whilst I’ve made a few wrong turns, ultimately the lessons I’ve learned from that has led me to a far greater place.
Keep up the great work.
Thanks for the great comment Leighton! What’s so amazing is that I truly believe that anyone who is able to analyze their past in peaceful reflection, without all of their emotional baggage muddying the waters, would be able to see the same trends/relationships you do in your own life!
Those same patterns exist for all of us, the good and the bad — and it seems that the only difference between people in this regard in their ability, or willingness, to recognize the patterns…. At the end of the day, our life is made up of a series of days which consist of a series of decisions – and it’s amazing that it’s often the “uber-logical” folks who ignore the causal nature and statistical significance behind that point, often even attributing their situation(s) to “luck”. It’s hard to get out of “victim mode” once one is stuck in it, but by taking a little accountability for the past, one is in a much better position to change their future.
Pardon the digression, lol! Thanks again for your thoughts!!!
Great thought! I often wonder what is it im unwilling to experience? Sure in the short term I gain relief but ultimately remain stuck because I dont want to face failure.